As an educator of teens, I am at a loss as to how to stop them from spouting vulgarity. Please advise.
"Vulgar" has been defined as "coarse, lacking refinement, cultivation or taste". "Vulgarities" then may be understood as coarse language that is conspicuously and tastelessly crude, indecent and obscene.
Teens are not the only ones who spout vulgarities. One is likely to be bombarded with vulgarities as a recruit in the Army. Why do people use vulgarities? They may hold the perspective that others see them as macho and cool when vulgar words flow from their mouths. Others use vulgarities to voice their anger and frustration. Yet others do so because they do not know how else to express their negative feelings.
So how can an educator of teens stop them from spouting vulgarities? Here are a few suggestions:
"… treat people the same way you want them to treat you …" Matthew 7:12a
"Let no unwholesome (literally rotten) word
proceed from your mouth,
but only such a word as is good for edification
according to the need of the moment,
so that it will give grace to those who hear." Ephesians 4:29
"With it (the tongue) we bless our Lord and Father, and
with it we curse men,
who have been made in the likeness of God;
from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing.
My brethren, these things ought not to be this way." James 3:9-10
(a) If the teen thinks it is macho and cool to use vulgarities then ask (those who are present), "What do you think of So-and-So using vulgarities?" It is likely that there are some who think that the teen is rude, immature, bad-tempered and uncouth.
If appropriate, also ask (those who are present), "Should So-and-So speak vulgarities aimed at the target person’s relative (perhaps, the mother)?"
(b) If the teen is angry or frustrated, acknowledge his/her feelings and teach the teen to give voice to his/her feelings without the use of vulgarities. For example,
"I feel [emotion] because you did/said [reason] ..."
Teach the teen to state facts and not to judge i.e., not to draw conclusions about the other person's motivation and character based on action(s). Next, give the other person the opportunity to respond to his/her grievance.
Children nowadays are left to run about in a store while their parents are busy browsing around. How can godly parents educate their children to refrain from doing so?
The simple and best solution is to leave your children at home (with your parents) when you go shopping. Seriously, (young) children run about in a store because they are bored with shopping unless their parents are at a toy store or a bookstore (for children who love to read). Another solution is job specialization - one parent’s responsibility is to engage the children while the other shops.
If you really have to go shopping with children alone then here are a few suggestions.